“Welcome to Holland”… There Is “Joy in the Journey”

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#welcometoholland, autism, dance, heartache, parenting

Y’all know by now that I am a Mom of a young woman with autism. The story “Welcome to Holland” was a great comfort to me and brought many tears after the shocking diagnosis. And each time I read it, for years afterwards, a tear would slide down my cheek.

My daughter goes to a program one day a week at Merrimack Hall. There, they created this beautiful interpretive dance to this same story. Watch. Be moved. Understand. Empathize. It is simply beautiful.

Dreaming With Your Feet

Not too long after I created The Johnny Stallings Arts Program, someone directed me to a poem entitled “Welcome to Holland.” The authorized version of the poem is reprinted below, with permission from author Emily Perl Kingsley. I am told that soon after receiving a diagnosis for their child, whether it’s prenatally or at birth or later, parents are told about this poem. Ms. Kingsley has granted permission for the poem to be reprinted thousands times and it has been widely circulated around the world for 35 years.

Because I used to be a dancer, I imagined “Welcome to Holland,”as a dance from the first time I read it. For years, I’ve wanted to set this poem to music and use dance to interpret the powerful emotions it describes. This summer, I decided it was time.

I tracked down Ms. Kingsley and asked for her permission to set this poem to music and…

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If I could sit down with Miley Cyrus….

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attention seeking, behavior, compassion, empathy, fame, family, forgiveness, friends, hollywood, love, Miley Cyrus

I admit, it would be hard not to smack her across the head for how foolish she has been acting. But I’d refrain. Well, I’d try to.

I’d try to find compassion, understanding, sympathy and maybe some empathy for this young woman’s burden of fame, overexposure and more.

I’d tell her that she has enough musical talent that she doesn’t need to post almost-nude photos of herself on Instagram.

I’d tell her that her significance should come from being a creation of God. A child of God. A God she used to claim to love and honor and respect. It’s not too late, Miley.

I’d tell her that respect is earned. That being classy gets you a lot further than being sassy.

I’d tell her that she may need to find new friends because she’s probably in the wrong crowd.

I’d tell her that it’s time to forgive her parents.  Forgive them for exposing you to Hollywood at such a young age. Forgive them for not being perfect parents. Forgive them for messing up.

And I’d tell her to forgive herself for all of the blunders.

It’s not too late to turn things around, Miley. It’s not too late to become the woman God created you to be.  Imagine with your influence the lives you could touch for good???

I haven’t liked this Miley and mostly ignore anything having to do with this Miley.  But after seeing the Instagram photo just now, I see a young woman in desperate need of attention who will get it any way possible.

My heart is aching for this Miley this morning. Hoping someone walks into her world that is strong enough to help this Miley find herself again.

This girl of mine…..

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autism, children, disabilities, family, god, gratitude, IQ, music, people, programs, school, special needs, strong, thankful, worship

As a special needs Mom, one of the things I least look forward to is report time. The annual meetings that go over the same things we’ve gone over for the last twenty-something years.

I just finished reading a summary of Megan’s life in a two page format. The school’s she has attended, from elementary through graduation (a few are missing, but does it really matter? Nah!), a list of her strengths and a list of her weaknesses.

Guess which list is generally longer.

And then there is the IQ score from 2008 from an IQ test that she had to take but was in no way an appropriate test to give a person with autism and intellectual disabilities. But, the state required a “number” so I had to fight the schools like crazy to administer the test to get a number that in no way truly describes her actual intelligence just so that she could be eligible for services. Are you scratching your heads, too?

So I look at this report and see that sad number and it just takes me back to a place I don’t like. A place where we prayed and hoped that the doctors were right and that “she’d catch up”. A place where all the dreams that one puts into having a baby girl were shattered. A place where we know she will never live on her own and the fear that accompanies that in wondering who will care for her and protect her when we’re gone. A place that makes me question….did we do something wrong? Could we have prevented this?

I don’t like these reports at all because I don’t want to dwell there. I don’t want to be sad for what isn’t. What won’t be.

So I will file those reports away and not think of them again for another year. Instead I’ll think of how smart my girl is. How she has the thought process to try and get herself out of trouble by redirecting the adults around her “let’s have a hug!”; “Hi Mom! I’m so happy see you!”  It takes thought processing to manipulate. :))

And I’ll think about how our girl makes us laugh with her “Meganisms”. She comes out with the cutest and funniest things sometimes. People always say that Meg will say what we all want to say but we don’t have the nerve!

I’ll think about this girl of mine who loves to worship God through song. Who will lift her hands in church without inhibition. Who will stand up when she thinks a song warrants it and bring those around her up with her. If we all could feel that free, imagine how wondrous our time of worship through music could be! And the girl who sighs a bit when she thinks it’s time for the message to be over and head to lunch. :))

This girl of mine will dance around a room because the music fills her soul and she just can’t stay still!

This girl of mine isn’t materialistic. She could care less about any of the things that young women care about. There’s no worry of trying to impress others. She is free of that burden. She might be the lucky one in some ways!

This girl of mine is fiesty. She’s strong-willed. She is determined. She has her own mind.

This girl of mine loves the people in her world. And she is loved well by many.

This girl, who turns 25 years old next week is a young woman, loved by God.  And she is so much more than an annual report. She’s a gift from Above. Our blessing!

God’s “plan”. My willingness?

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bible, faith, follow, god, hope, love, plans, scripture, service, serving, surrender, verses, worship

With the  new year upon us, I’ve seen countless posts on Facebook about looking forward to what “God has planned for me”.  That’s a wonderful way to think…..a great attitude in being open to our Creator. But is that the whole picture?  What about what we plan to do for God?  You don’t hear anyone exclaim, “I can’t wait to see how I am able to serve God this year!”.  It’s usually, and I’m certain for most, not intended a selfish exclamation of “what is God going to do for me??”.

This caused me to ponder what my responsibility is as a believer. As someone who claims Christ as my Savior and strives to live a life that is honoring to Him. (note the word “strives”…..not “arrived”)

So, although I am the furthest thing from a Bible scholar or teacher, the pondering thoughts did make me delve into Scripture to refresh my soul as to what the Word says about surrender. About service.

Job 11:13-15c     Surrender your heart to God, turn to him in prayer, and give up your sins. Surrender — even those you do in secret.  Then you won’t be ashamed; you will be confident and fearless.

Galatians 2:20  I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

Luke 9:23     And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.

Proverbs 16:3   Commit your work to the LORD, and your plans will be established.

Matthew 22:37  And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.

Romans 12:1-2   Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.

Galatians 5:13    You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.

1 Samuel 12:24      But be sure to fear the LORD and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you.

John 12:26   Whoever serves me must follow me; and where I am, my servant also will be. My Father will honor the one who serves me.

This is just a smattering of verses that talk about service and surrender. It’s apparent that we have a responsibility as believers.  So what will we do for the Lord in 2015? How will we serve Him in gratitude?  What are OUR plans to serve HIM?

Closing with this scripture which delighted me!  Zeal, spiritual fervor and serving the Lord.  Would make for a perfect 2015!

Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.

Romans 12:11

Hello 2015!

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Alabama, faith, family, god, Guatemala, love, missions, Serve

You have been on the heels of 2014 for what seems like all year. “Right around the corner”. “This year has flown”. “Can you believe it’s December already?”.  We have all heard these statements and we’ve all said them.

The most exciting thing in 2014 for our family was the engagement of our son to his longtime sweetheart. This happened on January 31, 2014, which would have been my Dad’s birthday. When my son forgets the date in the future and I’m certain he will, I’ll always be able to help remind him. :-))

The remainder of the year was pretty good. It’s the year that I fell in love! Oh it’s okay, my husband knows. Even my children know. And honestly, anyone who really knows me probably knows. I don’t hide it. I’m not ashamed. It brings me joy so why not share it?!

I fell in love with Guatemala and it’s people this year. My heart desperately longs to go back. Again and again. Financially, that isn’t a possibility but in 2014 year alone, God graciously provided a way for me to go twice.

I’ve learned so much about myself and others during this love affair. I’m not the only one who has fallen over this cliff and I gladly share the burden of loving this country with them. I share this with my husband. With my son. With my future daughter-in-law. And with countless friends who have gone before me or with me.

Some say, “but there is so much to do here” and while I desperately agree, there is also much to do “there”. Can’t we do both? Do we not have enough resources to help families? To help improve their lives? How and where they lay their heads at night?

My soul longs to be there and I’m homesick when I’m not. I feel as though God has changed my heart and although I am excited to see what He has planned for me this year as 2015 is upon us, I’m also excited to enter this year with my sight set on pleasing my Father. Not waiting for Him to light a lightbulb over my head, but living each day trusting His hand in my life. Oh my heart. Holding my hand as I walk down this road that is full of bumps, curves, deadends and the straight and narrow.

My heart is full of gratitude. Gratitude for my family. My dear friends, near and far.

My God.