I own a little BBQ joint alongside my husband. He’s the Chef and I’m the up front gal. Works well for the most part until one of us crosses the invisible line. (kidding. sorta.)
So today, I had a lady come in for a couple of sandwiches to go. She was pleasant and sat down at one of the tables to wait for her order.
Shortly after that a young woman walked in to place a to go order. The woman sitting down looked at her very small frame and said “you’re barely big enough to open that door!”. I stood there, hoping the young woman didn’t hear what she said and then thought of all of the times I might have said something like that.
This young woman didn’t seem to know what the lady had said or she just smiled at her and kept ordering, but I am certain this wasn’t the first time this young woman had heard a comment about being tiny. She was tiny. Very.
I’m a heavy gal. Big boned, taller than most of my friends and have always been heavier. Genetics definitely play a part in it but at the same time, I have only myself to blame for not getting my tush moving long ago. I’m working on that now, but that’s for another blog.
I used to forget that I was heavy until one time a friend of mine asked me how I felt about it. “Felt about what?” was my reply. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ohhhh,…that I’m overweight? That little problem? To be honest, I had never really “thought” much about it because I didn’t view myself that way. I was confident, successful in my job, moving up the ladder and seemed to be able to date whoever I wanted to. (This was after college. College years are for another blog).
I have been fat-shamed. Most recently is a time I can’t even talk about. Let’s just suffice it to say this guy is not one of my favorite people. Wasn’t before he embarrassed me. Certainly isn’t now.
I know what it feels like to wish in a instant your body was different. I also know what it is to live life forgetting that you might be bigger or smaller than you think you are. (some people call that denial)
Today, I saw it from a skinny perspective and my heart went out to this young, beautiful woman. Is she tiny? Oh so tiny! But I don’t know her life. I don’t know if she comes from a family of teeny tiny’s. Or does she have an eating disorder that she’s been fighting? Has she suffered abuse in her past? Is she currently? Is she just a small-boned woman who will always be tiny no matter what she eats or drinks?
I will make a very concerted effort that unless one of my friends is dieting or working out for health reasons, I won’t comment on their skinny selves. We all…..all have issues with our bodies and our esteem. We all have something about us that we’d change in an instant if we could. If we all looked the same, how boring this world would be! I’m a heavy girl right now and that’s just the way it is. Love me or not, it’s what you get. Love that young woman or not, she managed to open the door to let herself into our restaurant just fine. And left with a sandwich and hush puppies!